shopping carts in random places make me sad
there is nothing for you there friend
DATING TIP: Hold the door for your date. Rip the door off its hinges. Use the door as a weapon to fight off other men. Establish dominance.
Today in a debate I told the entire class the friendzone doesn’t exist and three boys gasped like I told them their parents had died
"Will, come over I’m lonely."
"Hannibal I can’t, I’m busy."
"I have puppies."